Why are you hiding?

Bible Text: John 20:19-31 | Preacher: Rev. Jenn Geddes | While attending and preaching at the first Regional Women’s Gathering in Western Canada last month, I had the privilege of and listening to keynote speaker Mary Jo Leddy, an activist, author, nun and order of Canada recipient. Part of her talk was on her new book, “Why are we here?: A Meditation on Canada”. Due to her 25 years of experience working with refugees she shared that she has unique insights on what it means to live in Canada. Part of her reflections talked about our colonial history. She pointed out that when the first Europeans sailed down the St. Lawrence River they found themselves in a vast wilderness. They looked around at the rocks, water, and trees and they were concerned by this inhospitable looking land. Then they met the people- a people who were equally surprised and concerned to see these unfamiliar faces in their land. She writes, “This vast space seemed menacing and indifferent. This sense of threat did not cease when they landed…The first challenge facing the European settlers was to survive…the imperative of survival blinded them to the summons of a new land, the promise held in the encounters with new peoples, the call to a new way of being…survival moved the settlers to build garrisons.” In their fear the Europeans decided that instead of learning from and working with the people and land, they built garrisons. Now good things can occur when it comes to survival in garrisons, there is a sense of similar moral and social values that develop, one could even argue cooperation amongst these similarly minded people deepens. There is certainly a sense of being in this together- they weathered storms and fears together.
However, Mary Jo Leddy argues that still today our default response to something we fear or do not understand is to retreat to our garrisons. She continues, “The garrison mentality also had its shadow side, a shadow that seems to lengthen even unto today. The garrison as a culture often took shape as people pulled together because there was a common threat. In other words, it was a culture defined more by what/who it was against rather than by what/who it was for.” In fear we harden our lines of who is with us and who is against us. I tend to agree with Mary Jo. We often define ourselves by who we are not rather than who we are. We Canadians are not Americans. We are Presbyterians are not Pentecostals. We are Comoxians are not Courtenayers? I would argue that this is not limited to the Canadian experience but very much a part of North American culture. It is why building walls, creating stricter border laws, and tariffs are the default actions of our politicians. But today we hear that others found themselves in their own garrison, behind locked doors, hiding in fear but that those walls, doors, and fear could not keep Jesus out.
It has been a week for us since we heard of Mary’s experience of meeting Jesus in the garden. But for the disciples not even a full day has past. Mary announced to the disciples that she had seen the Lord and that he had told her to give directions to the disciples that Jesus would be ascending. John’s version does not give us detailed instructions but one assumes that Mary told the disciples not only that Jesus would ascend but where and that the disciples were to meet him there. Yet, the disciples find themselves behind locked doors. It is understandable that having heard Mary’s words and perhaps of Peter, and the other disciple’s experience that they are a bit concerned. We now have at least three people who have witnessed something strange and are spreading the word about these strange occurrences but the disciples do not yet understand. Instead of opting to go out and explore this news or work with the people who have witnessed these things the disciples retreat indoors. They are afraid. It also sounds as though they have good reason to be afraid, because as news spreads about Jesus’ possible resurrection the disciples are worried about an attack from the Jews. The gathered disciples have heard Mary’s story but in fear they huddle behind closed, locked, doors.
I have sympathy for the disciples. After all, they are still coming to terms with their grief. It has only been a few days since they saw their friend and teacher, betrayed, beaten, and crucified. The marks of suffering are a reminder that there is no pretending that the ghastly events of the past days had not happened. And then, they hear words of a resurrection?! It is hard enough to deal with grief without added pressures of trying to discern what is truth and what is rumour. No wonder they are retreating in fear. No wonder they are huddled and hiding in their version of a garrison. Only these 10 have a shared experience of following Jesus only to see him crucified. Which actually makes me wonder, where was Thomas? If the other 10 were gathered in this house, what was Thomas doing that caused him to be out the moment Jesus appeared. Perhaps Thomas was the only disciple actually doing what Jesus had asked- going out and serving in the community. But I’ve preached on Thomas more than once- today it is on the other 10.
Jesus’ appearance and words of, “Peace be with you” brings reassurance. When Jesus appeared to Mary her tears and fear were transformed into relief and joy. His appearance to the disciples seems to have the same affect. Their fear is transformed into rejoicing. There is peace in Jesus’ presence but as I think of Mary Jo Leddy’s words I also think there is peace in the presence of others. As soon as we remove our fear or misunderstanding, our ignorance or prejudice, there is relief and rejoicing. There is peace in learning that we do not need to fear one another.
Jesus’ simple greeting is comforting. But it is also more than just a greeting. Its effect is similar to that of other resurrection stories, of Jesus appearing to Mary in the garden, of Jesus appearing to the two Marys after they see the angel, of Jesus appearing on the road to Emmaus. Jesus’ presence triggers the memory in his followers of his words, particularly the words spoken as Jesus’ bent down to wash their feet, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not let them be afraid.”
Jesus follows up these words of greeting and peace with a commission and a gift. He sends the disciples. They are not to be huddled together in a home but out in the community. And in the event that they feel they are ill prepared for such a job, before they go, they are equipped with the Holy Spirit. Former Church of Scotland Ecumenical Officer, Sheila Kesting, adds these insights, “As Jesus had brought words from God, so they are to pass on the words they had received from Him. The words of peace, Jesus’ gift of the Holy Spirit, are not for them alone. The giving of the Spirit, Jesus’ breath upon them, echoes the words from creation in Genesis 2 [when God breathes upon Adam].” Jesus forms a new community commissioned to proclaim the Gospel of love and forgiveness, not fear and judgement. The sending out of the disciples and the gift of the Holy Spirit and the peace which Jesus offers work in conjunction with one another, or work in harmony with one another so that we do not need to be afraid. We do not need to run to our garrisons.
The church, and I mean the church at large but likely you can name instances where this is true in our own congregation, often feels as if it is in survival mode. We run the risk of fleeing to our garrison, of huddling together behind our locked doors, of making sure that other people don’t come in. Yet, Jesus walks amongst us because nothing can hold him back and says, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” We need to focus on the going out, more than the coming in. Amen